Dear Diary….. A Blog Post From My Chaotic Mind.
If I kept a diary these days, I am sure my mind would be less cluttered and more free to concentrate on the important elements of each day at Chaos HQ.
Afterall, ‘writing it down’ is the advice many have pushed my way when I speak of the brain clutter that goes round and round in circles in my head.
Most days, I declare that I just don’t have time to pen my thoughts.
Today, I am going to share some of them with you.
Just so you too can have an insight into the random chaos that I think about…
I want to decorate. I need to paint our bedroom so it is ready well before bub’s arrival. I have colours running through my mind but cannot make a simple decision. Does this go with that, will this look good over there?
I need to go to Spotlight. I have to start making things. Like cot linen and baby rugs and all sorts of things that I have been inspired by on Pinterest. But there is no point doing any of that until I decide on a color scheme.
Money is an issue. I just want to go out and spend. I want to buy some things for the new baby and I want to get some things for the house. Like the new dinner set I have on layby at Kmart. Except I can’t. I have to wait. And I really suck at waiting.
I look around everywhere and see mess. So many jobs to do and so little inclination to do them. I know I will be happy when they’re done, I always am. So why do I leave it all so long? I put all the washing away today. Felt so good to be caught up. Now I just have the rest of the house to contend with.
We discussed some baby names today. It just made me really sad. What started with baby names got into a conversation about my dad, and what funny names he would have given the new baby if he were still with us. Levi’s nickname at 6 months was Rambo. He wasn’t far wrong either.
I started to wonder how I would cope in hospital, so far away from my family. 5 days, 100kms away from the kids, knowing that I am going to be an emotional wreck…. Sure they will visit, but in short spurts and then I will miss them again.
I think I need to start a hospital survival kit so I don’t go completely insane in there. Hmmm what would I even put in it?
School shoes, 3 out of 4 kids have managed to destroy their brand new shoes already this year. What’s annoying me the most is that I purchased expensive ones this time. Last year I just kept buying $10 Kmart shoes that would last 4-6 weeks if you were lucky. This year I spent a small fortune on brand name shoes only to have a buckle be completely faulty, a mary jane strap torn completely off and now the sole fall apart on a skate shoe.
And the thoughts go on and on…
But realistic and dare I say it.. ‘normal’??? I don’t know.
I am hoping you guys can tell me!!!
Does your brain go at you 100 miles an hour with constant thoughts and confusion?
Is it a sign that perhaps there’s too much mind clutter going on?
Love to hear your thoughts on the matter!!
Luv Jac xox