Lucky Dip - Bit's n Pieces

The Mother Meltdown.

Monday, 30th May 2011

The Mother Meltdown.

Monster Squad Mum 5 Years Ago!

Monster Squad Mum Thrives on a challenge, is always organised, loves to keep a tidy and functional house, is creative and enjoys expressing it through arts and crafts.

She is patient, caring and well mannered (most of the time), she loves spending time reading and writing with the school kids and building a fun environment for the littlies! She is proud of her squad and would go back for more….and more…. and more…..

Sounds promising doesn’t it?Β  But what happens when Monster Squad Mum has a meltdown???

I was asked this question by a wonderful and highly respected lady early last week and it has been ringing in my ears ever since.

Is the meltdown on it’s way? What will happen during this meltdown? Will my family survive a mother meltdown? How can I stop this suspected meltdown from happening? ARGHHHHHH It’s a lot to take in on an already crowded mind.

What if this dear lady is right?I mean it is always easier to see things when you are on the outside looking in, isn’t it?

Lately I haven’t really been myself. I’m starting to worry.

I am tired. It’s safe to say I’m beyond tired, more like exhausted.

I’m rundown – some kind of cold/flu has taken hold.

My patience level has dropped and I am ‘fed-up’ on a regular basis.

The more I think about it, the more I am starting to believe the MOTHER MELTDOWN is going to hit me…..

Monster Squad Mum NOW πŸ™‚

Monster Squad Mum TODAY – Was disheartened by the challenge of cleaning out all the office stuff from Aria’s bedroom, and was Β  feeling very lost in the chaos that is her unorganised house. She wished the world would go away so she could crotchet that beanie she’s been on about but instead she washed the dishes.

She lost her cool with Veruca on several occasions, ranted about not giving a damn and dropped a few ‘F’ words here and there. This morning she avoided reading in the classroom and just resented the fact that all her hard work over the last few days was destroyed by mid-day as the Veruca/Levi tornado swept through the house.

Hmmmm It’s not looking too good, is it?

Bless my family I love them more than life itself, but surely I am not the only mother in the universe feeling a little under the weather and trapped by the daily grind of life between the same (rundown – needs replastering & painting) 4 walls?

I am certain this information was not in the baby making brochure….

We as mothers are forced to put on a brave face day in and day out no matter how we really feel on the inside. We carry many a burden around on our shoulders that no one need know about and are forever taking a “Just get on with it” type stand.

If we are ever brave enough to make our weaknesses public we are accused of whinging and moaning, we are looked down upon as though our right to motherhood should be taken away, and as one kind person once suggested to me “Suck it up princess – It’s the life you chose”.

Yes people, I did choose to have a big family. Every one of them. That’s right, no ‘accidents’ in our house. I also chose to have them close together and in my 20’s rather than 30’s. All decisions that I (and the hubby) consciously made, because we wanted a big family.

What I DID NOT choose is the added stress that life has thrown at us in the last 5 or 6 years. (Enough there to fill several other blog posts in the future!).Β  Till now I have delt with it like a regular little trooper.

But the stress and upset is taking it’s toll, it’s swallowing me whole.

I am certain it’s time to confront all these stresses no matter how hard that may be before I become victim to the Mother Meltdown of 2011.

So walk with me (errrr read with me) as I prepare to restore the old Monster Squad Mum once more….

Monster Squad Mum of the Future????

Monster Squad Mum TOMORROW – Will get out of bed knowing that the day will be busy with the usual tasks but she will also make a little time for herself (afterall, it will be her birthday). She will focus her pent up anger on the pavement (weather permitting) and go for a walk to help clear her mind and make a start on reducing her ‘Bloggers Butt’.

She may begin to delegate tasks out to others so she can avoid another string of late nights and maybe at some point even grab some regular time out for herself. Lastly, she will hold her hubby and her kids in her arms, cuddle them tight and tell them she loves them with all of her heart.

If you’re nodding your head and this post strikes a chord in your heart please feel free to comment as I’d love to know how you’re dealing with things to avoid the dreaded meltdown. We may all be able to help support each other πŸ™‚


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    8 comments
    1. Well Jac I think you do a marvelous job with your family, and all the renovating you do, so rather that run yourself down for feeling down why not give yourself a big pat on the back. You probs feel like this because you are not feeling too well at the moment and all that plaster dust has brought on this chestiness and cold so make sure you are feeling a lot better before you even start on the painting cos paint is also another thing that plays havoc with the breathing tubes. Yes make time for youself and a little walk is one way of clearing your head and letting new ideas creep in (not that you need any you seem to have so many good ideas floating around your head). Anyway hope you get spoiled today and have a good birthday, and get lots of cuddles back from the little monsters and of course the big monster too. Love you loads Joan xxx

    2. Jess

      Oh, Jac! Sometimes a Meltdown is the World's way of saying 'STOP!!! YOU"RE DOING TOO MUCH!!". Of course, a mother's work is never done. All you want to do is strike A, B & C off your list, then Fate chucks in a D, E, F and bleeping G for good measure. I often get overwhelmed when the "me' inside the 'mummy' is feeling neglected. It's the 'me' that ends up throwing a tantrum worse than any 2 year old at a supermarket screaming for lollipops. Best solution is to absolutely commit to a bit of guilt-free timeout (ha! what's that?!) and do something just for YOU! You then feel like you have something to look forward to. Hope you're feeling better soon xxxxx

    3. Brianne

      Hearing you on all points Jac! Sounds like my house (although with a few less children)! It's often easier to just get it done, not ask for help, because that just creates a whole other discussion, argument, set of stressers. And mum's, I think without knowing, suffer hugely from 'mother guilt'. We wanted to be mums so therefore to ask for help, say no, rant and rave, admit defeat or simply say I can't do this, makes us feel we have failed in the role we chose and revel in. I wouldn't change being a stay at home mum but bloody hell it's hard sometimes (and my feelings are heightened at the moment due to exhaustion from two weeks of very sick children)! Pity none of this was warned about in the baby/parent books ;P

    4. Kari

      Whoever told you to 'suck it up princess' should be slapped about the head repeatedly. I'm sure every mother out there will agree that at times this job sucks, no matter how many kids you've got, how close together they are or how old you are. Do you love your kids, do you spend more time cuddling them than yelling at them, are they fed, is your house clean enough that they aren't getting sick within its walls - then honey you're doing ok. All the rest is just icing on the cake. Take some time for yourself REGULARLY, it will benefit you and them.

    5. Staki

      I am in meltdown mode right now. Baby girl #e is not sleeping. She is also no longer a baby. At 15 months she feeds more times than a newborn overnight. I am at the end of my rope. I AK barely coping. I ran a red light the other swux I am so tired. I yell at my big girls more than ever & I live in fear that the nausea I have been feeling for weeks will equal more of me to give to others.

    6. Michelle

      Couldn't have said it better myself. I too have gotten the Suck it up Princess comment, or similar. Yes I did choose this life, but I still reserve the right to bitch about it, just as everyone bitches. Does not mean I would change it. The grass is always greener too I think. Our house is always half done or being renovated, but we had kids early on - well for these days, I will still in my late 20's. And all my friends houses are all done & look beautiful, yet they are now in their 30's & just starting to make their family. And all of a sudden they understand what I've been going through, & how hard it is. Time out is necessary, but finding the time is near impossible. I have on the occasion had a nap, I know I'll feel better for it later especially at the dinner time rush when I need my energy. lol

    7. oh yes I hear you!!! recently had no. 3 and am now embracing the disorganised and untidy house! never thought i would! and HAPPY BIRTHDAY for tomorrow! hope you can grab some ME time!

    8. Nat

      I too am feeling the Mummy Meltdown looming. You are so right, it's not the kids or the housewifey stuff, it's the million and one added pressures, and random shitfits that life seems to throw at us just for the heck of it. And our job does not stop. Everyone around us "turns off" at some point. We do not. Even while taking time out to do something for ourselves. No one ever tells you this, and there's really no way to be prepared for it. If hubby whines about a bad day at work, people sympathise. If I say I had a hard day (and when I say that I mean freaking tough) they either laugh, or pull out some version of the "toughen up princess" line, or both. That is when I throw the "it's not faaaaaaair!" tantrum, although most times i remember to keep it in my head, at least until I'm back at home where i kick the fence until i feel better! Most days are great, some days are not. That's life I guess!

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